…that’s really cute!” unmistakable [redacted] squeak!
You know the last time i heard that squeak? It was in reply to the disrespectful asian accent one on necromantic. “ha so mama do na worry wen u cana see da babaii etc” since these are personal notes 🙂 ill tell you what the russian voice said:
“WELL RIICHARD! DON’T LET IT GET TO YOU WHEN U CANA [hate] ME OK?”
Honestly made the darkest parts of me laugh so much. Such dark humor. I mean has any love on planet earth ever been so tragic, broken, funny and so strangely united all at once? We are literally , literally the death of this place. “he annoyed me and did a bunch of gross shit ill fuck everyone and lay snare traps” and me “HAHA nice try, im at home playing dark souls. Might unleash ragnarok and a few alien invasions then blow up the sun later idk, feelin cute (once my skin stops crawling).” THAT IS US! That’s literally us! [Never mind] scripture hahahahahaha. We are the perfect storm. By the way there was a time when we were telepathically communicating and i clicked on in a few seconds. Did you see the big purple brain alien? No? It was like a kang and kodos type of thing that took up most of the ship. It was integrated with the metal work!! And i want to share the experience on the seventh. I dont think that was you. Directly. I think that there’s a place somewhere that has literally my soul, and an enhanced emulator off yours of sorts (other committed humans) somehow. And i picture a silver wire microphone type thing dangling. Do you put your head in it and mumble or transmit thoughts or what? You actually speak !? Also they were clearly playing talk to me, then “go your own way” but paused the latter when i talked about nuala. I love gutting myself in letters. Sometimes messy but when i cant handle bits i delete or burn or mentally draw lines around them. Actually, nothings a mistake really, is it? I hope you love this life. I wouldnt change a thing, most days. Well things yes, but as we spiral out entirely it seems, it was for a purpose. I bet you have more human in you. Thats not a douvle entendre but it also is. So yeah, i bet you actually feel it when you look down at my pathetic heap of everything in its entirety, studded with a few handsome pics. “where did it all go wrong” haha and then there’s my untold hypertragedy of this permanent absolutely perfect young girl in every way, 14 and 16 and breaking my heart merely kissing CRAIG. AND my imagination is INSANE and I JUMP AT MY OWN SHADOW! LOL. And you know how id probably have got desensitised and then entranced at the grid. And yeah, it hurts me to do that magic crap, that never translates too great even in memory or relic, does it? Lets be honest, at least some of it was haunting enough to leave a decent echo in the memory. And its definitely only possible when you’re cooperating. So yeah. Thanks, and thank yourself, and ill thank suzanne prince too on your behalf if you got any great stuff out of it. Im actually in contact with gods, aliens, and i definitely think ive embraced that legendary dutch sun so much. Thanks for everything. You are the best and my favourite master of the lot. Obviously. I can only be myself when you let me. Joe has such a smooth voice thats so calm and absent of frivolity, which he wants me to ditch, but its gonna be a family of a psychic brother and astral wife for as long as possible! I will miss the magic cos im so cock sure it happens as usual. Also how do i know you considered it narcissistic when i carved a selfie in the famous iron man statue? And NOS is definitely more enduring and powerful than any swan album, eeven though its not like any other book or that. It needs said. Im sure youve heard all this stuff in the wires, but i suppose its like a rubix cube i know how to solve. That’s why i write these. I think you’re usually a few (maybe more) steps ahead always. The seventh, that was so so so so beautiful. Were you there or not? Your reaction was so wet and adoring to the first letter. But i wanted Evelyn to raise her voice. Today shes more alive, corresponding to how i feel writing this. We are seriously linked right below the ribcage. I bet my magic doesnt hurt you, and i needed to believe it was to make it work. Seriously it feels like vines and high pitched tones going through my entire being at lightspeed. I was built for that emotion, that jerks the chest like that silver spring song. It hurt just right so good so so so so so goooooooood. Meeting evelyn andd eveerything in that first letter bearing your name is more of a chunk of me than id like to admit.
Look, im probably not gona have much of a unit as okami, ok? Im sorry but can there be some sort of genuine kick to my life? Idk, surprise me, like the gardeners and legion did in this one, but i neeed strength. I need to be the opposite of this life. And i cant just walk into the next one. Obviously.
“can that be it”
GOD I HOPE SO.
Lets be realistic about how unrealistic yet understandable this situation is to us. I need you to function. Thats clear. Maybe im your dream, invention or antenna or astral radio device tree, magic wand, god plant, parasite, soul love etc. Who knows or whatever. On with fate.
R e: the 14, 16 thing, youre shouting it over and over “WORTH IT”. there. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, the best times ive had with you were on that bloody chair you looked strangely ashamed on. Oops went back into the holiest holies. Im not divulging more. We were so beautiful obviously. Very annoying life. The MOON is an absolutely rotten horrible place for the sun to play, but there, you were well worth it. Absolutely.
From the ghettum of it all xxxxx
The Humble Rock Dove 